AN IMPORTANT LIFE SKILL

What do you think are important life skills for everyone to have? This might be a vague question with endless answers and that is ok. Not to worry! Well, what I want to talk about is simply the skill to handle stress. I will focus on children (the Watotoz) or youth alike. What do you know about stress and how do you cope with stress? Do you sometimes find yourself rushed to get ready for school or to catch that school bus? How that situation/s make you feel? – Hassled? Bored? Happy? Motivated? Stressed? Anxious? You can be the judge! To me, I can tell you right away that when I’m rushed to do something it can stress me out and sometimes really stressed out!

Most people believe that stresses only affect adults; but in facts as per statistics the children get stress too… According to the psychology foundation of Canada, stress among children is increasing for the past years; however learning how to handle stress is deemed an important life skill for everyone. Some stress is completely normal and part of everyday life. Doing house chores my cause some stress to me and that depend on my day too. But, like my parents would always remind me that “Too much of anything is harmful”, well in this case, it’s no exception! Too much stress is bad for everyone children included!

Have you ever felt butterflies in your stomach before and/or during a test? What about days when your teachers dump so much home works on you and you can’t think or sleep right? Have you ever been so worried about something that you end up with a very terrible headache or anxiety?

If you have, then you’re not alone. You are feeeling stress just like everyone else! Stress is what you feel when you are worried or feel weird about something. Stress can be defined as “a state of mental or emotional strain or tension resulting from adverse or very demanding circumstances” online dictionary. This worried feelings or uneasy feelings can make your body react differently. With your emotions; you can feel bad, angry, sad, self-unworthy, bored, tired, etc.

As per kids health site, when the stress becomes too much can cause even bad health effects to us. You might experience craving for food and sleep. This may cause you to sleep or eat too much. You may start to feel cranky and insecure. You will start to find it difficult to pay attention in class and remembering tasks and responsibilities. You’ll find it hard to calm down and relax, some become quitter and seem to lose interest in things. They’ll find it difficult to go to school sometimes. They may even have trouble getting along with friends and families (which is opposite to what all parents want or wish their kids to do). Stressed kids can start fights or become bullies. I have seen some of such behaviors at school. Some don’t even show their stress and that is bad too. But others will act badly and hurt everyone’s feelings.

As per kids health site, plenty of things can cause stress in a kid’s life such as school demands, family struggles, divorce, illnesses, bullying, etc. There are such things as good stress and bad stress. Good or not so bad stress will make or motivate you to accomplish your tasks. I usually get stressed before a test or an exam and I can’t wait till it’s over. I get stressed once people fight and I’m caught in the middle. Stress is part of everyday life.

Take this for example:

I, Clark Morris, was once in Grade 7, my Science teacher told us about the project we would be starting on The Solar System. We had to prepare a presentation, it entails a big junk of marks for our final grade and a deadline. Once I got home, I knew I had to prioritize my responsibilities on the time I had. I knew I want to do well and get good grade on this assignment. So stress aside, my whole family helped by leaving me alone, which is the way I work best. I gathered the materials I needed then sat down at my desk to work on my computer to do some research. Then I started to compile everything together till it was done. By the time I got in bed it was past my bedtime. The goodnight rest was just what I needed to get me up the next day.

The night before the presentation I was very scared. But, I knew I had to do this. I had to be ready for this. I practiced orally in front of my family. I made cue cards and practiced again in my room till 9 o’clock, my bedtime.

The next day at school, I asked to go first for my presentation so my anxiety wouldn’t spike up through-out the other presentations. At first I was scared so much, that my palms started to sweat, I got butterflies in my stomach and my heart was bounding really fast. I knew I have to calm down otherwise I might forget everything I have prepared for. I breathed in and out to calm my beating heart. Some kids could notice my anxiety so as my teacher. I was more determined than ever to finish my presentation. I started talking and I finished it with a standing ovation from my classmates. That was a bonus that day and I can’t forget everything about it! My doctor said it was normal!!

Two days later, I got my mark back. I had gotten a 4+, the best mark and I was proud! … I’m now in grade 11 and I’m more comfortable with presentations and I no longer have that much anxiety…

Clark Morris was experiencing anxiety, which is a form of stress. People with TOO MUCH anxiety or stress though as I said earlier, it can make them behave differently. Some may not want to come out of the house, they won’t want to be seen or heard, and in worse situations some may become abusive to others or may even abuse drugs, etc. (kids health site)

Luckily, there is something you can do to manage your stress: Spending time with people will relax your nerves. Learn to prioritize, Listen and make eye contact to those you speak to you. Exercising is a great way to burn off stress and calories, listen to music, play games together, or watch a good movie. Get a good night’s sleep, share ideas and feelings with your family or friends you trust, ask for help when you need to, and many more. You’ll be amazed of how great you’ll feel. On the other hand, try to understand how those around you feel. Everyone need to be heard, loved and valued. Give those who have stress hugs and comforting word! Sometimes a quiet moment, reading your favorite book maybe good enough.

The Good News is, even very young children can learn how to handle stress. The younger they learn the better. Having routines may be a good way to start.

Don’t worry my fellow readers; if you are feeling stressed, you know what to do. CALMING YOURSELF, RELAX, FAMILY TIME = STRESS FREE LIFE!

It’s not rocket science! Find what works for you (use that skill!) and you’re good to go!!

Vanessa Wambura