I am not sure if the administrator of this blog will post this blog piece of mine. Still, today I am going to write about one great powerful thing that most of parents have forgotten about, which is “listening”. I have noticed for many years (my 10 years of life) that parents don’t listen to their children. Some parents jump to conclusions and never let the child explain. That is a big problem.
The last time I know, listening was supposed to be a two way process. Children are supposed to listen to parents and parents also have to listen to children too. However, the last time I remember, most of us children are made to be the one to LISTEN only. It is like we are in the church, the priest is taking and all of us are just sitting there, maybe just saying AMEN and a few other words. The whole point is that, parents need to listen to us as by doing so, you make us grow in what we know and feel part of the family and society. Otherwise, when we get older, we will also not listen to anyone.
I know for a fact that most parents (mine too) don’t listen to their children or don’t give them a chance to speak or explain themselves when they want to. Why? I don’t know. Maybe parents think they know better (which they do) but they don’t know that the children know some stuff too; we know things, maybe things that the parents don’t know. (To the parents don’t deny it, it has happened to me several times, but I am told, God gave you one mouth and two ears, listen more!). Children wish we could be given a chance to use our mouth too. I think that parents should give children a chance to speak too.
I am going to give you some tips to parents on how to listen to their children,
- Honor their no’s. – Children may say no to things that they don’t agree on. They can’t say no to everything but to things that they think is not right. Remember it should be reasonable.
- Seek first to understand, than to be understood – parents, try to understand us children by listening to us, than trying to make us understand you more.
- Don’t yell at us – Yelling only makes the relationship between you and us worse.
- Ask to know how our day at school was – give us 30 minutes or more, and let it be the time you will listen to us. Children are very different than you think. Each has their own personality, some like to talk, others to draw, while others like to read or play sports. Once children turn 10 or more, they get more independent and don’t like to talk too much (or listen!). Listening to children will be really fun and nice because you get to see how much your child knows, and that is the beauty of it.
I thought I would make a poem for the parents!
Listening is like learning mathematics
It takes time, don’t rush it
But with patience, parents can master it
Then you will do it everyday
And it will be fun.
I hope that this article opens a spark in the parent’s minds so that they know what to do.
Angela-Acaye