I have written about which gender I think are more superior beforehand in my previous blog piece “The Superior Being” and, as you might or might not already know, I think that the female gender in more ways than not is more complete than the typical male gender. As I stated before, the male has his good share of flaws, one of them being seldom sharing his own feelings with others.

I know how difficult it is for men to express their feelings to anyone for I once too was like that. I know some boys in my class, give them good news, bad news, any type of news and their expressions would be more or less the same. These friends of mine barely raise their hands in class and they keep their opinions mostly to themselves. I usually only see them acting like they are not mute when hanging out with their own peer groups. This is not a good thing, for boys our age should feel comfortable expressing themselves through talking, sharing opinions, feelings, and thoughts.

I never really have ever been quiet, nor have I had a problem expressing myself (in fact, if you ask my friends and parents, they would say I have a problem of expressing myself way TOO MUCH!) Ever since I was very young, I have had an exceptionally booming voice. I question with my teachers in school when I am upset with my test scores. I debate with my classmates and peers about the silliest topics. I dispute often with my parents on their house rules so much that the nigh usually end with me receiving a dire consequence. Almost everything I say is said in a jokingly matter. I think this is my way of letting my feelings be known.

How often do you see a male kiss another male? No, I do not mean in THAT way, I mean for example, a long time colleague and friend has returned from a five year volunteering missions around the world. You never thought you were going to see this friend again due to some catastrophe or something of the sorts, but fortunately, on the day he is supposed to arrive back, you see him walking out of that long queue of arriving passengers. All you men reading this, would you embrace the heck out of your long lost friend, kissing him on the cheeks, and exclaiming how much you missed him? Or would it just be a simple hug, not even a regular one, more like the “bro hug” in which you clasp each others’ hand and do a one-handed embrace with a pat on the back? There are some men who will show how much they missed their companion they have not seen in a long while. Others, especially teen boys, will most likely resort to the latter, showing little to no emotion whatsoever while on the inside, many feelings of joy could all be crumpled up into one small corner of his consciousness.

One huge factor of the storage of a teen male’s feelings is the inevitable peer pressure. One will always feel pressured to act one way or the other in their adolescent years and one act that is always shunned by other boys is true sentiment. Any sign of caring or concern I guarantee you will almost always be referred to as “retarded” if you mention anything of the sorts. It is real hard for maturing boys to have a genuine moment with other peers for fear of stereotypes. Showing sentimental feelings will instantly gain you a one way ticket to bullying and ridicule.

Fellow male watotos and even older readers who once used to be young, how often do you or did you hug your mother when you were leaving her? I have seen many friends of mine shrug out of their mother’s goodbye hugs constantly. It has been proven that boys who are not afraid to embrace their mothers are less likely to be victims of peer pressure. Even a simple hug is a way of showing your feelings to your parents and that can help them know that you are okay or not. I am not going to lie… I have been that person before, avoiding physical communication with my mom in and out of the public’s eye. I have changed though, knowing I will not have her forever (and being kind to her can get me things!) and, in fact, annoy my mother with consistent bear hugs and love-filled embraces to the point in which she says I am not allowed to hug her … or even hear my father saying… hey, stop hugging my wife…go to a University, finish studies, get a job, get married and hug your wife…. (What if I become a priest? .. I would ask….). She has instead resorted to handshakes and fist bumps which, ironically enough, I would not be seen dead doing in public with her! I still push for my hugs anyways….

While adolescent boys have trouble with sharing their inside feelings, they are not the only ones. Adults to, especially fathers, too seal their hearts from others and let their feelings unknown. A father unable to let his emotions known can have problems with his children, not hugging them or kissing them good night, not showing up to their extracurricular activities or not even saying good morning to them at all. This could lead to a depressed child, someone who does not feel special enough, someone who thinks they have let their father down in a way unknown to them.

Cracks could also appear in a marriage if a husband is too distant from his wife. Signs of a dissolving marriage can start off with something as small as the husband not wanting to share how their day at work went and become as big as a husband being so uncomfortable with his wife that he starts having an affair. It is key that, in order to sustain a healthy family, all parts of the family should be willing to share, no matter how small they are, their feelings, opinions, and emotions and the one most unlikely to be able to complete this task is yup, you guessed it, the father.

It is not us men’s faults that we are not as open to the idea of letting our thoughts be known; probably just the way we were made. But, if all the men of the world can learn to share just a bit more than they do today, even if it is just raising your hand to answer a question or replying “fine” when someone asks how was your day, that could lead to a more open, loving, and caring world.

Angelous